As retold by Bruce Lowitt

A Jewish mother sent her son off to his first day of school with the customary pride and precautionary advice: "So bubeleh, you'll be a good boy and listen to the teacher? And you won't
make noise, bubeleh, and you'll be very polite and play nice with the other children? And when it's time to come home, you'll button up warm, so you won't catch cold, bubeleh? And you'll be careful crossing the street and come straight home?"

"Yes, mama."

When he returned that afternoon, his mother hugged him and kissed him and exclaimed, "So did you like school, bubeleh? You made new friends? You ;earned something bubeleh?"

And the boy said, "I learned my name is Irving"