As retold by Bruce Lowitt

Bertha and Jenny, widows at the senior center, are talking.

"Listen," Betty says, "Murray Feinstein asked me out to dinner. I know you went out with him last week, so I'm wondering, what was it like?"

"I'll tell you. Murray knocks on my door right on time, he's dressed in a gorgeous suit with a  lining could make you die. And he brings me flowers. We go downstairs and he's got a big, beautiful car, with a driver yet. We go to see Jackie Mason, he's so funny I thought I'd plotz, then a lovely dinner. Then he takes me home and when I open my door all of a sudden he's
all over me like an animal. He tears off all my clothes and - oy, Jenny, what he did to me after that, I don't want to tell you."

"What, what?" Jenny says. "Are you telling me I shouldn't go out with him?"

"No, but if you go out with him, I have some advice."

"What?"

"Wear a shmata."